(From talking philosophy.)
For starters, I didn't actually feel very nervous. I knew I'd done all I could even though I'd been sick during the SPM -- there'd been a nighttime visit to the clinic the day before Sejarah, and the day before Physics was spent in the hospital, waiting for my blood test results. Not fun. So yeah, I walked into school feeling fine and almost eager to finally get my results (SPM, not blood test).
It was nice to be in school again (in 'normal' clothes, with nailpolish on and fringe not pinned up). I was practically bouncing around, beaming at the junior prefects on duty at the time. Got to see most of my Form Five teachers again, as well as my former schoolmates. I swear, all the guys had longish hair except for, well, Khairul -- 'cause he's Khairul like that.
Photo credit: Madeleine
Teachers strolled into the hall shortly after 10 a.m., and we were allowed in a little later. We stood around, chatting, catching up, sneaking glances at the teachers sneaking glances at our results slips. There was a sudden mad dash when it was announced that we could get our results, but I was the first in my class to get them, since people in front of me chickened out. (Why is everyone so skittish about being the first? Is it a superstition of some sort?) Anyway, I looked down past the grinning Mr. Elvin at my slip and went, "Oh."
Oh. Oh indeed.
I'd been expecting (and worked for!) straight A-pluses. I guess you could say I was...confident, although to a lesser degree. So when I saw that A for Moral messing up the line of A-pluses, mocking me, I didn't know what to do except move out of the line and blink. Except, I didn't really have time for the latter because Krystal said she had to interview me as I was one of the top scorers. I can't remember what I said. I hope it wasn't anything stupid. Then there were photoshoots and a meeting with the Headmistress, and somewhere along the line, I got over myself and the A-plus that was missing its plus. Hee hee.
There's still that nagging, niggling, argh-just-one-more feeling at the back of my mind, but it's slowly going away. If there was ever a subject I wouldn't mind not doing well for, it'd be Moral, because it's a pointless, pointless subject. This isn't even sour grapes -- ask any Moral student!
I want to do well in college-level Moral, though. Mr. Yoshua makes it pretty awesome.