Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Excerpts

I am so very tired of being the responsible one. I'm tired of being called 'so serious', being told to relax. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm amplifying the situation a few times worse than it really is, or if others just don't see the gravity of it. The thing is, we can't be shiny, happy people all the time; we have to be serious when the occasion calls for it. And if you ask me, that was definitely something that called for seriousness.

Now, half a day later, most of the anger has dissipated, leaving only disappointment. My friends are mostly good people, and I'd thought better of them. The worst part is probably that most of them don't seem to feel the least bit of contrition. They're avoiding me because they know I'm mad. By avoiding me, they think they're avoiding the problem, because they see the problem here as me, not the fact that they were being awfully irresponsible.

I realise that I shouldn't have gotten so worked-up over something as petty as this...although I probably wouldn't have had they not laughed and told me to relax. Anyway, a friend of mine was right -- I'm wasting my time, they're not going to change. If they haven't by now, after over four years, who's to say they'll turn over a new leaf in the near future? Or ever, for that matter? I'm going to let go and put this behind us; waging a cold war would make me just as immature as them.

I'm really just pretty disappointed, is all.

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